Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Backing out.




After a few days hangin with Mitch and his family, I finally left Glens Ferry. I was headed out towards Twin Falls into another hot desert stretch. After walking most of the day I ran into a camp ground on the side of the freeway.  I thought it would be a good idea to stop for the day so I pulled in and was so warmly welcomed.  I paid for a camp site and settled in with LeeRoy. The camp site had wifi (haha camping/wifi?) so I watched  some NetFlix but after a few hours I started breaking down camp. I was wrestling with myself... frustrated and kind of angry.  There was so much on my mind! I needed to beat the streets and work some of that stuff out so even though I had already paid for a camp site, I headed back out on the high way.  I walked till late at night and set up camp on the side of the freeway. 

The next day I woke up early and walked  into Wendell. It was a Sunday and I so wanted to go to church! I prayed as I walked into town for a place to go and not even a half mile later I found a place.  As I walked up to the church I saw all these SUVs with shiny rims and perfect families all dressed up. They jumped out of their cars and head to the front door of the church. I looked up at the sign and saw that service started in 10 mins. I look back down and saw a few families staring at me from the front door of the church. I have no idea what they were really thinking and by now I should be used to people staring .

But I didn't go... I backed out. I was so embarrassed /shy and even now I get so bummed I backed out.  It's no ones fault but my own.  I should have gone! 


Now I don't know how you feel about spiritual warfare but this is it. The devil wants to separate us for the church, our church family and friends. In my case he wanted me to believe that I had no right to be there. He wanted me to believe that  those people were judging me. He was whispering a single thought to me "I don't belong here". I believed it. I bought in to the lie. I honestly walked away feeling ashamed of myself and LeeRoy. Once I was able to see the lie for what it was a few hours later the devil attacked yet again. He changed his tactic. It wasn't I don't belong and shame. Now it was "your a coward." Here's the kicker I have been a Christian long enough to know that this is the same lie that the enemy uses on me soooo many times. But the thing is that it all comes on so sudenly and it feels logical.  I know however this is not how the Lord is. Well not in the relationship I have with Him. He is always so merciful and gracious with me even when I don't deserve it. He doesn't  see me as a coward and He was not trying to shame me. 

Later that day I walked in to Jerome and received a text from a woman who heard about my journey from her sister. She invited me to stay with her and her family and I gladly excepted. I love those little surprise texts at the end of the day! Her husband picked me up at subway and we headed back to their house out in some farm land. We chatted and I enjoyed my time with them. The next day they took me back to subway and I did the last little few miles to Twin Falls. 

Sunday, October 14, 2012

The great 8

So here I am approaching Mountain Home after some tough days of Leeroy and I kicking butt and taking names. After covering so many miles I decided that when I hit the town I would take a half day so Leeroy and I could rest and then power out some more miles.
Now backtrack to Caldwell ID when it was St, Leeroy and I walking, rapping and spreading the word on N2S/Uzima when we we're a approached my a real friendly guy who after chatting about what we were doing was so pumped he gave us a huge bag of beef jerky for our journey.Can you say heck ya!
Like most good things that eventually came to and end and as I was on I-84 just outside of Mountain Home finishing this bag of jerky thinking of how I had survived on it and just wishing I could let that nice guy know how it truly had blessed me. As that day was coming to an end I saw a car pull up and to my surprise it was that very guy, he was heading camping and had seen me on the road and so I was able after all able to tell this kind man how his gift had truly blessed me.....
Later on that night I got a text from a family who had seen me walking and read about me online finding my number on my Facebook and inviting me to come stay with them. What an amazing family, so very kind and caring. After some much needed rest, the next morning I hit the most friendly coffee shop in town with some incredibly kind individuals and then to the bank. Later that afternoon I ran into the family who I had stayed the night before with and they invited me to dinner and to stay another night. That night at dinner we shared stories and many laughs......good times#blessed

The next day I hit the road again by 6am with Leeroy and I both feeling renewed and ready to continue powering it out. With Glens Ferry as my destination I used this time as I walked to listen to messages and continue working on memorizing Romans 8

This is all I have gotten thus far

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. (Romans 8:1-4 ESV)
Thats some heavy stuff, out of this world huh?
Within a couple days I had walked into Glenn's Ferry, surprisingly not the smallest town I had hit thus far but for sure a small town. in this town is where I met one of the most amazing guys I have met thus far. His name is Mitch and let me tell you a little bit about him. On first glance he is a big, tough, weathered man who you would not want to make mad. Hands as big as a bear's paw and voice so deep and raspy it will make you think twice. Anyways underneath this tough demeanor he is one of the kindest, most genorous men with a true heart of gold. This man has gone through it all , he has been in jail in three different countries, battled with addiction and he like most of us carries the scars to prove the life he had weathered. Mitch is a guy I connected with on every level with us becoming fast friends and nearly inseperatable, with me even going to his work and working with him.....love this guy and his whole entire family!
I met Mitch at the first place I came to in town I hadn't even put down my bag before he scooped me up and whisked me into the town, introducing me to everyone in Glenns Ferry. Favorite part, here goes, it about 11pm at night, we are at a bar and grill with his wife. We are telling my story to everyone in the building. Mitch gets up puts some quarters in the juke box and a Garth Brooke song comes on, this whole entire building erupts with everyone cheering and singing along word for word. I am looking around feeling like I am in a movie so surreal. We stayed,talked and played pool till about 3 in the morning and then we headed home. Next day we got up early, Mitch builds bridges on the highway. So we had to go to put water on the bridge to help the curing process...now I am no expert but this helps keep the concrete from cooling down and hardening to fast at least I think. This is when I truly got to know Mitch, we talked about everything, life, all of it. I told him about my testimony, we talked about dady issues. Amazing moment, while standing on the bridge with cars flying by us we start sharing our history. I was able to remember that verse in Romans that's says we are set free from our past and that there is no condemnation and that the is no shame......I told him the impact that had on me and how I finally was able to let the past be the past and how I realized we mess up, fess up and clean it up. God is not keeping score and how powerful this has been  for me because my past has left me feeling completely defeated and useless with the shame of it all attempting to drive me and control my thoughts and life. But O the blood of Jesus and the grace he has shown a sinner  like me.


Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Peace

.. I feel like the last few blogs have been all about the worst of who I've been. It's far from over, and I know that there are a lot of things I still have to deal with. But the worst of it has been dealt with, or at I hope 

My mom gave LeeRoy and I a ride back to Boise where we spent some time camping at the fairgrounds.  I had the chance to speak at  Calvary Chapel Boise, and had an an interview with the news. They did such a great job with the coverage of my story.  It was cool cause It wasn't the normal shots of LeeRoy and I, Ya know walking and standing on a corner with all our geared on. But Instead they met me at a diner, I had a coffee cup in my hand and we just chatted. Some kids were there and they were also in some shots petting LeeRoy.

  Mymom headed back to Spokane and was getting ready to leave for Kenya on a missions trip where she was going to have the opportunity to spend some time with the kids of Uzima and then head back in to the back country for some other stuff. After she left I spent some time with friends and then started walking through Boise once again. A few really cool things happened as I walked through the city. The news had aired my story a few time(I think on the 4-5 and the 9-10 news shows) So the word was getting out and in a big way. I was at a cross walk waiting for the light to change. It does and I started to step off the curb when all of a sudden a fire truck pulls up and blocks all the traffic,  they  had their lights on and a few of the guys jumped out. They hand me some money for a donation and gave me a ton of encouragement. At first I was worried and slightly freaked out that I was in there way. they pulled away  and the light changed but no cars were moving, everyone was staring at me. I laughed and pointed at the light and traffic started moving again.  It was so wild. I finally made  it to my friend Noah's house later that night. LeeRoy and I slept on the porch and headed out fairly early the next morning. I walked through town and was stopped everywhere I went. It was more than usual but I think it was because of the news coverage. I had lunch at pizza shop and sat out side where LeeRoy was tied up just on the other side of the fence. After a bit a police officer shows up. he rolled down his window and yells, "hey has anyone talked to you about you're goat?" I said, no. He began to tell me that he had received a call about animal abuse, and that the goat had no water. We both looked at the water bowl setting in front of leeroy about a foot from his face. We look back at each other and both started laughing. I got up and walked over to him, I handed him a card and showed him what I was doing and he ended up donating to the cause, it was so great. Another cool thing..earlier  on in this trip I met some guys that were biking from Boise to the coast.  Well I ran into them in Boise where i got to catch up with them and hear all about there trip. The crazy thing is  that this  happens more often than you would think. I had met someone in Yelm Wa. and ran into them in John day oregon. 

When I finally got to the edge of Boise things seemed to get difficult. I couldn't find a back road that cut through to twin falls. I ended up getting lost. I missed a few turns and all the roads I tried seemed to be dead ends. I ended up walking 12 miles out of the way, and man did it suck.  I finally headed back to where I last had forward progress and started there the next morning. I made the decision to walk on the freeway. I was seriously freaked out about at first, but it turned out to be one of the safest and best roads I had taken so far. The only problem I had were the bridges.  

A few high lights on the freeway were the truck stops.. I try and find a place to camp close by and enjoy the truck stop life.  So far my favoriet has been the Boise stage stop.  I don't know how to describe it but,  perfection. Little restaurants and old farm equipment outside for decorations.  I set up camp way back in the parking lot next to an old tractor. The sun was just starting to go down and it was still warm out.  I climbed up on that old tractor and made a few phone calls.  After that I  put on some music and just sat and watched as the sun set. It was a perfect "moment". Honestly I felt like I was at home again, LeeRoy and I on the road has come to be something that I love, and that is so crazy to me. I finally felt peace after a long few weeks of chaos.